Not as my will

Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will.” (Matthew 26:39)

I want to say a word in favor of obedience.

I’ve heard people say that there is freedom in obedience. It never really made sense to me.

I think it makes more sense today.

Being obedient to what you understand to be the will of God — after prayer, discernment, and struggle — does free your soul.

It does not make your life simple. It does not solve all your problems. It does not protect you from pain. But to hold the cup in your hands and say, “I will drink it,” well, it can leave you standing in the bathroom, where you hope none of your co-workers can hear you, crying tears of relief.