John Meunier

If anyone wants to provide leadership in the church, good! But there are preconditions: A leader must be well-thought-of, committed to his wife, cool and collected, accessible, and hospitable. He must know what he’s talking about, not be overfond of wine, not pushy but gentle, not thin-skinned, not money-hungry. He must handle his own affairs well, attentive to his own children and having their respect. For if someone is unable to handle his own affairs, how can he take care of God’s church? He must not be a new believer, lest the position go to his head and the Devil trip him up. Outsiders must think well of him, or else the Devil will figure out a way to lure him into his trap.

1 Timothy 3:1-7, The Message

How to really file your “check day” or annual reports. Thank you, parson.

Journalism has this reflex that may be the last aspect of traditional journalism to die. As they padlock the doors of the NY Times building one day, one of the reporters standing outside will reflect somberly on the moment and then say, “On the other hand, there are some who are happy about this …”

This comes up today while reading this story about the unexpected – and hard to explain – box office success of the movie “Paul Blart: Mall Cop.” The story talks to everyone who kind of knows the people who actually made the movie and speculates about why it is doing so well and whether the star Kevin James has broken through. Then we get the reflexive twitch:

Whatever the reason, there’s at least one group that doesn’t heart “Paul Blart”: real security guards. For starters, they say the phrase “mall cop” is nearly as demeaning as the dreaded “rent-a-cop” moniker.

Then we get a couple quotes from “real security guards” about how they feel insulted and misrepresented. (This being the United Methodist Church, we should probably draft a resolution decrying the unfair stereotypes.)

And, I thought as I was chewing on this, I do the same thing in sermons all the time. I hit that point when I’m making a point or following a narrative thread. I look around and realize I’ve probably lost a few stragglers along the way, so I stop and do this little ditty. “Of course, there are other ways people have interpreted it …” “It may be that Jesus had something else on his mind …”

The argument in favor of such rhetorical strategies is that they serve a purpose. You speak to the questions your audience has. That makes sense. But which questions? If you preach to more than a handful of people aren’t you likely to be stirring up – if they listen at all – dozens and dozens of questions?

I wonder if this impulse would not be better left to itself more often. I am sure we should not let a reflex shape our sermon writing.

Rick Warren read Peter Drucker, and it gave him deep insight how to do ministry.

Eugene Peterson read James Joyce’s Ulysses, and it changed the way he understood ministry.

Where did Peter get his M.Div?

Dan Dick has spent a lot of time studying congregations of different sizes. He shares his thoughts.

The bottom line is that one size does not fit all.  Many people find everything they want/need in small membership churches, while others find they prefer the mega-church setting.  I maintain — based on year’s of research, thousands of surveys and hundreds of interviews — that as church membership moves from triple digits to the thousands and tens of thousands the nature of church changes, and it becomes exponentially more challenging to maintain quality of relationships, quality of engagement, and quality of ministry (even while the quality of performance, excellence of presentation, and quality of equipment and facility can actually improve).  This in no way implies that high quality is in any way guaranteed by a smaller congregation.  We ALL know that isn’t true.

(ht: Shane Raynor)

More of Dan’s observations here.

Bishop Schnase must love the number 5. It reminds me of that Sesame Street song:

Oh, five is such a pretty number
I’m awfully glad that I’ve
Five people in my family
One, two, three, four, five.

No word on how many people in Bishop Schnase’s family.

But he is ready with 5 Temptations that Confront Pastors. Here’s the short list:

1. Thinking too much of oneself.
2. Abandoning the spiritual life and neglecting personal needs.
3. Playing it too safe.
4. Trying to go it alone.
5. Losing focus of the mission and neglecting fruitfulness.

The bishop expands thoughtfully on each of his five points. Here’s a part of his discussion on temptation 5:

No members complain when the preaching is good, the pastoral care well-done, and the administrative machinery runs smoothly. But unreached and neglected people outside the church who need to receive the good news of Christ cannot complain and their voices are never heard. Someone has to keep pushing the church out of itself and into the community.

The good news for me is that I can only fail 5 ways on this list – unlike that darn 10 Commandments.

The bishop’s full post is here.

See where your state stacks up in the latest Gallup survey.

The economic collapse is taking a big toll on churches, small, medium, large, and mega.

It is causing pain in a lot of places.

Mark Beeson, pastor at Granger Community Church, wrote about the pain of cutting a half million dollars in salary and benefits from his church budget by cutting staff jobs.

The blogging staffers of GCC jumped in with their own words of pain. Mark Waltz hates it that the relationships will be broken. Kem Meyer is surviving the blows and trying to be fully present in the moment. Tim Stevens  wrote about pain and has written about Beeson writing about it. All the bloggers’ posts have supportive commens from GCC folks and outsiders who share sympathies and prayers for those out of jobs and for the remaining pastoral staff who are carrying on despite the difficulty of it all.

As the entire paid staff – part-time at that – of a church that would be a small-group at GCC, this display of gray-toned photos and mass grief is a bit overwhelming. Beeson insists it would be a violation of GCC’s mission to cut back on more programing to save the jobs of the staff who are leaving. I might view it differently if I were being tossed into the job market at the moment, but I am mostly grateful I don’t have to make the choices Beeson and his staff does. (Keep reading for Beeson’s take on my mushy-headedness.)

But – and I’m trying to be charitable about all this – does there have to be so much chest beating about how hard it is to fire people? I cannot imagine the CEO – one of those people mega-church pastors model themselves after – flogging the “owe this hurts” line so hard in the midst of layoffs and mass firings. Is there a line between public expression of sorrow and self-indulgence?

In particular, is there room for some public confession and request for forgiveness? A little more ashes and sack cloth and a little less woe is me?

Beeson explained that when faced with a tough choice, a responsible person recognizes limits. Those who don’t are bad people.

Why do weak parents produce weak children? Often it’s because they operate out of their feelings instead of their responsibilities, that’s why. They want to do what they want to do more than they want to do what is right.

Why do weak pastors produce weak churches? Often it’s because they are more concerned about their own feelings than they are about failing Christ, that’s why. Their desire for easy satisfaction is greater than their willingness to act responsibly. Weak leaders lack resolve, give up too easily and quit too soon.

Me and my little church are surely a testimony to the truth of Beeson’s point.

But I wonder if the staff of GCC is in any way responsible for the situation that led to these good people – these members of the family – being out of work in the teeth of the worst economy in 70 years. And if they were, wouldn’t a little confession be called for along side the profession of hurt feelings and the vow to soldier on despite the hardship?

If you need a toilet fixed, call a plumber.

If you need a good looking suit, call a tailor.

If you need to learn U.S. history, call a social studies teacher.

If you need a load of bricks hauled, call a teamster.

If you need a haircut, call a barber.

If you need to learn how to do a lot of push ups, call a drill instructor.

If you need to lance a boil, call a doctor.

If you need a cavity drilled, call a dentist.

If you need to see beauty, call a poet.

If you need a good meal, call a chef.

If your beagle needs a bath, call a groomer.

If your uncle needs to be buried, call a funeral director.

But, if you wonder, call God.

And listen.